


Reunion

by Lobotomite



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 07:52:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15359727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lobotomite/pseuds/Lobotomite
Summary: Adam is finally coming home, and Matty can't wait to see his brother again - but he has to admit, he's pretty nervous about meeting him as Matty for the first time.





	Reunion

Matty's return to Emmerdale was... well. It wasn't exactly how he'd planned it, to say the least. Part of it was his fault, he can admit that; it's a bit hard to pull off the prodigal son's triumphant return by breaking in and attempting to sneak out again as quickly as possible. He'd expected a fair amount of flack for that, and for not keeping in contact as much as he should have - he knew he deserved it, as well. The rest of it, her initial negative reaction to finding out who he was, shouldn't really have come as such a surprise, either; the anticipation of exactly that had kept him away for so long, after all. He'd been steeling himself for it for years at that point. None of that mattered, though, upon seeing her face fall, upon hearing his deadname from her lips over and over again - upon having  _Cain_ , of all people, the voice of reason while his mum spat bile at him. Every small and overt display of rejection felt like a knife to the chest, and all of the armour he'd spent so long trying to encase himself in might as well have been made of paper for all the good it did. 

It hadn't lasted, of course - he wouldn't still be here in Emmerdale, if it had. He loves his mum, and he'd do most anything for her, but he's done living a lie to make other people feel better.  He couldn't have survived with those knife wounds repeating over and over again. But she'd gotten over it, and as much as the initial rejection had hurt, she was still his mum, and when she was clearly remorseful he couldn't bring himself to keep forcing that separation.

And he's happy, now, here in Emmerdale. Happier than he ever thought he could be, in the town with so many memories of being miserable, with so many ties to the person he desperately pretended to be. The people of Emmerdale have been more accepting than he honestly thought they could be - there have been the occasional slip ups that are painfully unavoidable, but no real antagonism, and even those mess ups have trickled to a stop. And he's somehow managed to find himself a girlfriend, in this little village he'd sworn he was done with. Sure, they have history; and a history that isn't entirely pleasant, at that. But he's come a hell of a long way since then, and so has she. They were both struggling kids, neither of them was perfect, and he's not going to hold their past against her. 

Of course, there is a slight snag that does make their relationship more than a little bit awkward; namely, her previous marriage to his brother. It was awkward enough when he'd thought their relationship had ended because of Adam turning out to be a murderer; it's even more awkward now that they're both in the loop on what actually happened. 

It was a bittersweet revelation for both of them. Yes, it was a relief, learning that Adam really  _wasn't_ capable of murder - but at the same time, he had to face the fact that his mother  _was_ , and that Adam and Moira lied to both of them about something so incredibly important. It's hard, this whole situation, but if Matty is going to be honest, it didn't take him long to get over it when he thought Adam had done it, and it doesn't take him long to get over it when he finds out it was his mum. He wasn't there when it all went down, but he has heard about what Emma was up to, and he doesn't feel particularly bad about what happened to her. He's too busy caring about his uncle, and the cousin he'd never been able to meet as an adult, to put any energy into feeling sorry for the person who killed them. 

Strangely, what really hurts is that they  _lied._ It's hard enough for Matty, who hadn't really been involved, but he knows that it hit Vic harder. She'd been married to Adam, had considered Moira family, and they'd both lied to her, let her think the man she had married was capable of murder - and she has to deal with the fact that Adam had clearly put his mother before her and left their life together rather than come clean. 

So he doesn't blame her for not being here, waiting nervously for Adam to finally make his appearance. Yeah, it would be nice to have her here for support - this reunion is rushed and unexpected, and as far as he knows, nobody had actually managed to bring up Matty's transition to Adam. The anxiety of his possible reaction hangs heavy over what should be a happy occasion. But the whole situation has been painful for her, and he doesn't blame her for not being up to it - and, of course, it would make the awkward "I'm-dating-your-ex-wife" conversation happen a lot sooner than he would like, so that's another plus to her absence. 

It's not like he's alone, anyway. Their mum is there, doing her best to appear calm sitting at the table with Isaac; Cain is out actually bringing Adam back to the house, but Faith is there, bustling about in the kitchen; and, of course, there's Aaron, lurking in the corner and practically vibrating out of his skin in anticipation. As far as Matty knows, the people in this room, Vic, a handful of other Dingles, and Adam himself, are the only people who even know Adam is (well, should be) back in the village. He's not exactly sure what the plan is for getting everyone in Emmerdale - and, most importantly, law enforcement - off Adam's back. He's not actually even sure that Adam plans to stay, or if he needed to see his loved ones before disappearing for another year or so. But what he does know is, regardless of how long it's going to be and regardless of Adam's reaction to him, he's going to finally get to see his brother again after far too long away. 

Well, he  _should_  get to, anyway. Cain has been gone a long time, and it's starting to make everyone in the room tense - he's worried his mum is going to burst into anxious tears, even though so far she's done a pretty good job of keeping her nerves in check, and if Adam doesn't turn up soon poor Aaron is probably going to have a heart attack. 

"Why don't I-" Faith starts, and then cuts herself off with a cheerful "Oh!" as they all hear a car rumbling up the driveway. Everyone's heads swing towards the door, watching with quiet anticipation as the car's engine cuts off, and then, finally, the door swings open and all of the tension in the room releases in an almost audible rush. 

Matty barely manages a glance at his brother - it's still so strange, seeing him with a beard, he'd always had such a baby face growing up it seemed ridiculous to think he'd ever manage to pull that off - before their mum is clinging to him and obscuring Matty's view. Her face is buried in his chest, his in her hair, and Matty's chest squeezes at that familiar, easy laugh, muffled though it is. Matty can't stop smiling, it only now really sinking in that he gets to finally see his brother again, but at the same time his nerves are ratcheting up tenfold because his brother is going to see  _him_  for, really, the first time.

Aaron is starting to sidle towards the door looking like he's barely aware he's even doing it, eyes fixed intently on Adam, and Matty lets Aaron situate himself next in Adam's orbit, slipping into the background. He really is getting nervous now, heart going so fast he feels almost nauseous. 

"Alright, mum," Adam says when he manages to extract himself from the tight hug, eyes shiny and grin so broad it must hurt. "How've you all been, then?"

"Good, love, we've been good," his mum says, voice thick with tears as she rubs a hand across her eyes. "We've missed you."

"I've missed you all, too," Adam says, aiming for light but unable to hide the weight of what must have been an incredibly lonely experience, voice almost as thick as Moira's. He squeezes her arm and then has a proper look around the room, pausing for a confused second on Matty before sliding his gaze past and giving Aaron a bright, pleased smile. It shouldn't hurt - Adam would expect to see Hannah if he expected to see anyone, after all, not Matty. It still does, though, that irrational part of him upset that Adam can't just  _tell_. 

"Is that  _Isaac?"_ Adam is saying, bracing himself on his thighs and leaning down. "Hey, mate! God, you're big now, eh? You remember me?" Isaac is wary, giving Adam a shy smile around his thumb but curling away, so Adam shows some restraint and straightens up after one more reassuring smile, gaze lighting on Aaron.

It's all the prompting Aaron needs to rush the rest of the way over, throwing his arms around Adam at the same time as Adam does the same to him, clapping each other on the back and then just gripping tight. They have a short, quiet exchange that's muffled by their reluctance to actually let go of each other, so Matty's not entirely sure what they say, but before long they're pulling apart, Adam giving Aaron another firm, affectionate thump on the shoulder. 

"Come here, love," Faith says next, taking her turn for a hug that Adam good-naturedly returns. And then it's just Matty left.

Adam looks at him with curious eyes, friendly but clearly with no idea who he's actually looking at - Matty thinks Adam might have some vague recognition that he's trying to place, but it's just as likely Matty's just seeing what he wants to see. 

Awkwardness is threatening to hang over them - he can see his mum starting to try and figure out what to say, he can see Adam about to ask who exactly Matty is and what he's doing here, and he appreciates that everyone will try and explain for him but he hates having to awkwardly rely on other people conveying everything right. So he does what he always does, and just acts like there's no reason anything should be different.

"What," he says as cheerfully as he can manage, heart fluttering in his chest. "No hug for me?" He spreads his arms, giving Adam a grin that's half bravado and half genuine excitement at seeing his brother again. "I know it's been a while, but you weren't exactly an easy man to track down." 

Adam tilts his head slightly and searches Matty's face, brow furrowing over his confused smile, and god, he wishes he could just skip this bit. He lets his arms fall, hopefully casually, and shrugs. 

"'Course, you were all still calling me Hannah, last time I saw you. Things have changed a bit since then, obviously," he says, with a little gesture at himself. "It's Matty now, by the way."

He can see the instant it clicks, Adam's face clearing in realisation, and this - this is the worst part. The split second when recognition has hit and all Matty can do it wait for the reaction and try not to run through all the worst case scenarios in his head. 

It's not that he thinks his brother would purposefully be cruel - Adam isn't the type of person to go out of his way to hurt other people. It's just that Adam  _is_  the type of person who reacts first and thinks later, who doesn't have a filter, who's not going to think to hide it if his first reaction is negative even if he regrets it later, and Matty just - he just really needs Adam's reaction to not hurt. 

It's barely even a second between realisation and reaction, but that second feels like an eternity. He can feel everyone else's tension as well, his mum prepared to go on the offensive for him, and he loves her but he really doesn't want his simple presence to ruin Adam's homecoming. He's gearing himself up to panic, thinking maybe he shouldn't have come for this first meeting, and then Adam's face breaks into a wide, easy smile and he's striding over, pulling Matty into a hug.

"It's been way too long, H- Matty," Adam says, catching himself quickly, voice thick with genuine emotion, and Matty lets himself relax, giddy with relief. He hugs Adam back, fingers twisting tight in his shirt.

"I've missed you," he manages into Adam's shoulder, blinking back tears. Adam squeezes him tighter and then releases him, grin still wide when he steps back to look Matty over.

"I missed you, too," he says. "Missed a lot, as it turns out." He hesitates, and Matty prepares himself for a clumsy comment about his transition - he's used to them, has come to expect them, even if he doesn't like them. But Adam just takes a second and then says, approvingly, "You look happy."

"Yeah," Matty says, cheeks hurting from smiling so hard. "Yeah, I really am."


End file.
